A decade is a long time.
Jun. 1st, 2010 07:56 pmBecause it's 2010, I recall some people writing up synopses of "the last ten years of my life" around New Years'. There's no way I could sum up ten years in a blog post, but I've thinking about the past decade for a different reason.
Ten years ago today the metaphorical ground fell out from under me, for everything that I treasured as part of my personal life was taken away from me. Here's some stuff I wrote shortly after the incident (I'm guessing early on in the following school year), and teenage superficiality and naive romanticism aside, it does capture my early thoughts about it. I think that as I grew older and learned to understand myself more, the depth of want became greater, loneliness hit harder, and the differences between what I wanted to believe in and what I was expected to believe in became more distinct. Ever more distinct.
Ten years later, today, I look to my shelf here, and everything I treasure is there. Were it even to be that all of the Finnish books go, to take away the diaries and the photographs would clearly be unjust. You can try to take away people's thoughts, but you can't take away their memories or their dreams.
Ten years ago today the metaphorical ground fell out from under me, for everything that I treasured as part of my personal life was taken away from me. Here's some stuff I wrote shortly after the incident (I'm guessing early on in the following school year), and teenage superficiality and naive romanticism aside, it does capture my early thoughts about it. I think that as I grew older and learned to understand myself more, the depth of want became greater, loneliness hit harder, and the differences between what I wanted to believe in and what I was expected to believe in became more distinct. Ever more distinct.
Ten years later, today, I look to my shelf here, and everything I treasure is there. Were it even to be that all of the Finnish books go, to take away the diaries and the photographs would clearly be unjust. You can try to take away people's thoughts, but you can't take away their memories or their dreams.