(no subject)

I try to fathom what lies on the other side of the other ocean... but nothing will come, and I am scared.

Even though I have seen thousands of photographs, the mind is a blank space, expecting at once everything and nothing.

It has already become a fable.

So I've tried the engineering and science workloads... now arts?

Looking at detailed descriptions, although each course is a week long and involves homework assignments and readings, some of the courses also involve a written paper of some sort due later, in June or July.

I've only ever written 2000-word essays - so 3000 words (that's 15 pages) is really going to be pushing my boundaries. But I suppose anything in the liberal arts gets to that level at the senior, uh, level.

I know people like siromygod are used to that sort of thing, but I'm not, because I'm no arts major.

So if I go, don't even think about trying to make me get a job this summer. I'm gonna be spending the entire month after my trip hiding holed up living in the U of C library (with books, and journal articles accessed from U of A online saved to my computer) writing my papers.

Without Internet access. I can't use the computers in the library there, because I'm not a UC student, duh.


I don't know yet how willing I am to pay this price.


I'm so scared I've forgotten how to sleep.




It appears that for some of the courses, doing the classwork gives you half credit, but only by completing the paper will you get full credit. I doubt the credit I earn would be transferable to my Science program anyway, since I've already maxed out my [non-Arts, non-Science] options up for transfer (from engineering; so any credit I earn in, say, interdisciplinary or world developmental studies won't transfer). But apparently the grades I earn do matter (from the Study Abroad "Terms of Participation"):

The mark you received for courses at the Host University is converted into the University of Alberta’s 4-point scale. This may be required if you are in an honours program, if you are eligible to graduate with distinction, if you are applying for some University of Alberta Awards, or if you leave while in one faculty and intend to change to another faculty upon your return. You should consult your Faculty Programs Office if there is a chance you may fall under one of these categories. The intent of the grade conversion is to compare your performance in the exchange to a level of comparable academic performance at the University of Alberta. Most students do not require grade conversions.

Yeah, well, I'm not "most".

Edited to add: If completing the papers is absolutely mandatory in my situation, then I may just go for three weeks. There's nothing in the 4th week that sounds interesting/un-political enough for me to write 20 pages on.