Things I miss [journal]

Torrential rain in morning. Arm and hand becoming an issue again despite only light use of computer (to check email) on Monday. Had beer (again nowhere near enough to make me feel funny). I'm starting to feel quite alone. Without my music to listen to, random snippets of songs appear in my head on repeat, and new melodies are composed but without manuscript paper or a keyboard to harmonize them, they get lost.

Digestive system still hurting sometimes, it might be an ulcer :s which would really suck because my mom once had to have surgery done for something like that. So obviously now I have to take medicine (antacids) and not eat as much, even though I've had a considerable loss of appetite since whenever I started to lose sleep last year.

I miss feeling funny. I miss challenging my limits and daring to step over the line into unlawfulness. I miss the security of my pointy objects. I miss sleeping alone. I miss feeling that I'm healthy and not having to worry about being ill. I miss not having to share a single bathroom with the six other people in the house, not having to play limbo to wash my hair in the shower because the shower head is low and having enough water pressure in the tap so that the shower doesn't come out like a drizzle.